Sanjaya Malakar (yes, that Sanjaya) is going to appear in a national ad campaign for Nationwide Insurance. From the press release:

Nationwide announced today that the next star of the Life Comes at You Fast advertising campaign is Sanjaya Malakar, former contestant on “American Idol.” Sanjaya will follow in the footsteps of Kevin Federline, Fabio and MC Hammer, who appeared in previous Life Comes at You Fast commercials.

Really, if you’re going to follow in anybody’s footsteps, the three people who come to mind as the obvious choices are Federline, Fabio, and Hammer. This is another of those can’t-miss, obvious opportunities.

“I’m thrilled to star in one of Nationwide’s Life Comes at You Fast ads, because I really love the campaign,” said Malakar. “My experience on American Idol was is [sic] a great example of how life really does come at you fast. The ad is a funny take on the serious subject of planning for retirement.”

A funny take on planning for retirement, eh? I wonder what they have planned?

In the spot, Sanjaya visits a monastery in India to seek advice and he is told that he needs a retirement plan, and some work on his hair.

[crying from laughter] Oh, geez, they were right! This is hilarious! See, because Sanjaya’s brown, right, and there are monasteries in India, right, and there’s like gurus and stuff inside them, you see, and Sanjaya goes inside one of them, OK, and the advice the shaman gives him is to plan for retirement and (wait for it) to do some work on his hair! Oh, snap! It’s like an Indian-retirement-plan Zoolander!

This is the third year Nationwide created advertising specifically targeting the South Asian market. The Sanjaya ad is one of six new spots that will specifically target the South Asian market.

First off, I think the last thing South Asians want is anything targeting them. Second off, how is Sanjaya the guy that gets chosen? Are they trying to insult South Asians? Anger them? Persuade them to never purchase a retirement plan? What on earth is their angle?

“The rapidly growing South Asian market is very important to us,” said Tariq Khan, Nationwide’s vice president for Market Development and Diversity. “The creative work in these print ads and TV spots reflect traditions and situations that South Asians can relate to.”

Ooooh! Right. That’s why I’m not in marketing. I didn’t have the insight to realize that this scenario is one that South Asians can relate to…

Seriously.

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